Its summertime and the living hasn’t gotten any easier

Lately, my heart is literally beating faster than I ever knew possible. And lately, bridges around me have been crashing faster and harder than I ever could have imagined. And me...I'm just standing by the wayside, my mixed feelings in tow, trying to catch my breath, while pleading with someone, anyone to assure me that all the choices I've made are right. That these are the choices that will lead me to my goals, to my happiness. I'm just trying to believe that the really good things aren't suppose to be easy to let go and also that just because something is good doesn't always make it the right thing. Here I go again, just trying to make any excuse, any rationalization to comfort myself. I want to believe that I'm right about everything that I do or have done, but the nauseous feeling in the pit of my stomach right now is screaming that I've been very wrong on more than one occasion. I'm so tired of fucking shit up. I'm so tired of regret. I'm so tired of talking about all these goddamn changes and not doing anything about it.