You are what you love, not what loves you back

What I wouldn't give to make a quick, clean getaway right now...
I am far too weak to handle any of the things life has thrown at me lately.
I always want to just sleep right through all the tough parts and wake when things have settled.
For one of the few times in my life, I am admittedly being 100% selfish. I'm taking as much control as I can capture of this life because I'm fed up with it running me. I'm fed up with regrets. I'm fed up with these thoughts that keep me awake at night. I'm not trying to wake up from this dream. I'd much rather wake up to one.